The Gyne Visit

The other day I experienced a classic example of why being a SAHM can sometimes completely suck! While my husband was at work, eating lunch at a restaurant and enjoying the company of other adults, (you have to be a SAHM to truly appreciate that part of this sentence) I had to take all three of my children with me to get a PAP smear. The four of us crammed into the tiny room and I tried to occupy them all with snacks (that eventually just ended up all over the floor...pissing off the doctor, of course) and a magazine (despite the fact that they can't read and "Women's Health" didn't amuse them in the slightest bit). Then it was time for me to throw my feet up into the stirrups. Yeehaw. It was at that exact moment when they all decided to scramble around the room. Of course. I'm trying to be civilized but at the same time I'm screaming at my two boys to "stay by mommy's head...stay by mommy's head dammit!" I was just so worried that they would remember it someday and be scarred for life. We survived and celebrated with a round of happy meals. Later, my husband asked how everything went...I usually just laugh, to prevent myself from smacking him, but this time I said "next time you have to go to the doctor to 'turn to the left and cough' I'm sending the kids with you!!"